life · me · ramblings

My dad’s lessons

My dad wasn’t a huger. My Dad wasn’t affection. His own upbringing made him that way. But I never doubted that my dad loved me. Being one of six children, it was very difficult to get one on one time with my dad. Not to forget to mention that he worked his ‘regular’ job and then crap loads of side jobs. The side jobs are where I spent most time with my dad. Then next time spent with dad was fixing stuff around the house. Lastly time spent with dad was watching horror and sci fi movies/series. Via the last one, I have more Star Trek/ Star wars knowledge than I’d care to admit. While bumbling around today getting last minute things for my husband for father’s day, it made me think of things I’ve learned from my own father.

WORK ETHIC. This is a huge one since it carries over into every aspect of life.  You work til you get the job done. PERIOD. No excuses. Do it yourself because that’s the best way to get it done. Also be willing to admit when it’s over your head and you need help.  BUT pay attention so next time you can do it yourself.  This one was big in making me be self reliant.

LOVING UNCONDITIONALLY.  Don’t give up. No matter what is going on, you fight for it. Your family is worth fighting for. It could be your marriage, your children, it doesn’t matter. The true definition of marriage vows, sickness, health, rich, poor.  The true definition of a REAL father providing for your children, roof over the head, food in the belly, clothes on the back. He wasn’t one for turning his back to anyone. I witnessed this time and time again. I know that I mirror my dad’s love. It is fierce and forgiving.

PATIENCE. Keeping your cool and controlling your temper is key to everything. I heard that my freshman year of highschool. And he was 100% on the money with that one.  I watched him at work and how he interacted with people.  He was King Midas, turned everything to gold. ALOT of that was due to his patience and waiting out situations or staying calm. I use this on a daily basis with special needs children.

SARCASM. This is essential to who I am. I’m always sarcastic or cracking a joke. And I know that stems from my dad. He always told ‘quarter jokes’. Them things made NO sense and where worth a quarter. But ya laughed anyways just because he told it so convincingly.  He always made a wisecrack. This definitely helps me get through the day!!

My father is still a young guy in age. But due to both mental and physical illnesses, my dad has aged very roughly. Most days conversations are impossible. But then every once and awhile, he’s there. And it makes me yearn for the guy that’s locked up inside that ill body. Makes me wish the conversation we were just having could’ve lasted 5 minutes longer. Especially when it’s about him being a vampire or sucktastic movies from the 1930’s.  I know that no matter how old I become in my eyes my father will always be the guy behind the grill, bandana on, coffee in one hand, cigarette in the mouth, talking about something completely asinine that later in life would mean so much more to me than I could ever express.


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