I tell myself to write. A lot. I tell myself if I write, I can get it out. I tell myself if I can just write once a week. It doesn’t even have to be about my grief. Just write anything. Get your mind going….just write…get it out… I just want to get all of… Continue reading Get it out….
After a few fights with insurance my sister had her first treatment. Opdivo. It’s given through an iv. It only takes an hour. There are minimal side effects. It is used to treat lung cancer BUT has made HUGE strides in treating malignant melanoma. This is when the fun started. No sarcasm. It was literally… Continue reading First treatment
It was a long 4th of July weekend. The fourth was actually during the weekend. Parties every where. Bonfire aromas floated on the air. Grills were at work every corner you turned. Vibrant explosions of colors starting every night at dusk. My outer persona was singing, dancing, having a good time. But inside I was… Continue reading Just let go and be here
Giving an estimate, I’d say 95% of my sister’s appointments were fun. Sounds odd seeing the mortality and grimness of the situation. However, my sister from the beginning told me that I’d have to put my “you too serious” face away. She only wanted to see that face when I had to ask questions. We… Continue reading You worry enough for the both of us
As I sit here today, my brain wants to write something amazing. My brain wants speak some words of wisdom to share with another person engulfed in grief. My brain knows we have to stay busy to keep moving. My heart, however, is somewhere different. The soft snuggness of the mattress seduced me to stay… Continue reading A ton of bricks
Ursula’s Pour Unfortunate Souls plays, I answer my phone: Kate!! Are you up yet??? I told you I’d be up earlier than you!!! (giggling) Me: Check your phone, I already text you!! My sister: Damn it!! I thought I beat you. On my way!! During the warmer months, I am a garage sale junkie. On… Continue reading Garage Sale
In March of 2014, my heart began it’s journey to heartbreak. My sister was diagnosed with cancer. She sat there. Stunned. All the color drained from her face. And the first place she looked, after the doctor spoke those words, was my tear streaked face. Panic. Anger. Not my sister. She’s just a baby. She’s… Continue reading Promise me